Once Dubya 2.0 strikes the Fordow Fuel Enrichment Plant and fails to destroy it, will he too zip into a flight suit, land on a carrier, and declare “Mission Accomplished” before the dust has even settled? Perhaps this time, the banner will read “Mission: Pending,” fluttering above a mountain that swallowed a 30,000-pound bunker buster without flinching. And if history rhymes, we may soon be treated to another round of performative triumph, complete with choreographed optics and a conveniently vague definition of success.

Some scripts never get rewritten. They just cast new leads.